It Isn't Just About The Win

Hi all,

Sorry it has been so long. I’ve just moved house and my commute of five hours daily was leaving me short on time.

However, unless I enter Miss England again this year, my reign as Miss Southampton  2014 will be over in just two months so I want to take this opportunity to tell you about one of the best parts of competing, and one of the lessons I learnt the most from taking part.

Kelsey Benson from the Pageant Planet hit the nail on the head with her recent blog. She said:

“Well ladies, you have lost it all if you’ve chosen the crown over this sisterhood.”

What you take away from a competition is not always necessarily a win in the form of a title, sash and crown. It is what you gain from it; confidence, fun, experience, and most importantly friendship.
You’ll have a lot more fun taking part by helping the other girls into their dresses, learning from one another and getting to know each other. Let’s say you win – you don’t want to be on stage with a few mild claps and not being congratulated.

Too often in the media women are portrayed as bitchy and that we want to tear each other down. I don’t see that when I compete. Yes there are the odd one or two girls who might not be competing for the right reasons, or might be a tad conceited, I won’t deny that. But the majority are just as nervous as you, and it is daunting – much like the first day of school. But we are all in this together, and as a potential winner you want to be a role model to your competitors alike.

As Kelsey says:

“Be the girl who wins and her competitors are happy she won. If you can be a friend, rather than a competitor, you will win every pageant you go to (even if you don’t win the crown)."

I have made some incredible friends over the years I have competed, from judges to competitors, business associates to judges, and I know that is because I don’t tend to snowball in all overconfident and think I am going to win. I NEVER think I am going to win, fact. But I do know I’ll make great friends. And that’ll boost your confidence like nothing else will.

To Georgie, Grace, Jourdan, Lorna, Amelia, Abi Hill, MK MK, Lucy Liverpool, Milly, Saffy, Hayley, Holly, Joelle, Jasmine, Kirsty H and all the girls on the Pageant Dress Sell/ Swap group, as well as all my Miss England sisters including my roomies Elle Paige and Laura, and the lovely Miss Hants Charlotte (16th in M/E this year!!!)  and everyone else, thank you for being amazing sisters (I am writing this in my lunch hour so excuse me if I didn’t mention more specifically L).

As Milly put on her Facebook today:

“Thank you to all the mums, students, professionals, models, athletes, friends, family and woman working.

“You inspire me every day to encourage to live and work without the fear of criticism and to support other women in their journeys too.”

Let’s support one another.